April 25, 2006

It has been a little over a week since I left my VP of operations position and am working in MT/QA. Every now and then I feel a twinge of regret but overall the experience has bee overwhelmingly positive for me. I would not have been ready for this step years or even months ago but now is the time. My home, my family and my children are more important and that position was overwhelming and stressful, leading to stress in our home effecting everyone else.

I am still working on getting a semi-schedule going but in the past week and a half my laundry is now done routinely, vacuuming done and I am doing some maintenance things I let slide like cleaning the stairway walls, etc. I even cleaned the garage some. I feel a great sense of satisfaction over these things but have a long way to go to get the house the way I want it. I know though day by day I will get there with some remodeling done along the way, both of the house and me! I have rejoined the Flylady list but it doesn't suit me as much. The biggest thing I get from it is reminder of routine and not big rush and stop pacing that is tiring.

Zach is doing better and better on his DEL workbooks and I am getting better and better at doing our reading and work daily. He is thriving on the routines and behaving much better. On days I work more I really notice it in his behavior. He is doing more coloring and staying inside the lines. He wants to do worksheets. He continually asks what words are he sees in the world and his vocabulary of words he is able to read is growing steadily. He still loves loves loves to be read to and sits very quietly with a long attention span for that.

Noah is sitting for quite a while independently now, 5-10 minutes I believe. He cannot get himself into a sitting position alone. He rolls place to place as Zach did. Just in the last week I have seen him a couple times brace his feet against an object and get his belly up a bit, preparing to crawl soon likely. He is doing the loud voice screaming that Zach did at this stage. It drives me crazy the noise but I know it is a stage he has to go through. He is still overall a happy guy though is showing more hyperactivity at times, especially when tired, and more fussiness. He loves to be held still, especially if it involves him pulling my hair while held. He likes the sling most of the time. He has a good attention span and curiousity for his toys, and of course loves any lint or dirt he finds on the carpet much better than the expensive toys - and everything ends up in his mouth.

Myah's Funeral

I originally wrote this into my planner but wanted to preserve it in my blog:

Today was Myah's funeral. David spoke and it was beautiful. I would not have had the composure to speak but he talked about his baby girl and how much he loved her. Her "accident" was on Feb 8 and she died on 3/17. She lived 30 days in hospice. Most were wearing pink in celebration of Myah's color. We went gravesid and that casket was so tiny. The priest reminded us all we do not know how long we have - every day is precious. I am so sorry I never met her prior to her time in hospice, but she touched my live nonetheless. Due to her I have made so many changes in my life and am so much more aware of every day with my own children and my family. Life will not wait for excessive work and business of day to day life. I now create time every day to be with them. Even if they outlive me, they will not be with me every day as children forever.

This morning Noah "babbled" for the first time --- mamamama, gagagaga, etc. He still has no teeth. He sits briefly alone and still loves to be held close and cries when down. He is calmer than Zach was, and smaller I think.